How to Be a Good Caregiver

Being a caregiver is both a rewarding and demanding role.  Here are some tips to be a good caregiver.

If you find yourself suddenly in a caregiving role, you may not know where to begin.  CaringBridge’s recent article entitled “5 Tips to Be a Good Caregiver” provides some great advice on how to be a good caregiver.

Communicate. This is the most important factor, when trying to be a good caregiver. Caregivers should strive to communicate with patience, understanding and empathy.  A person being taken care of can sometimes feel like they’re a burden or a nuisance. Good communication and reassurance can help prevent that. You should also have communication between you and your other family and friends. Asking for help isn’t always easy, but those who care about you will want to support you.

Take Care of Yourself.  When you’re constantly on call caring for a person who is ill, it’s easy to forget about your own needs. Caregivers can be so overwhelmed that they’re unable to take time for their other family or interests. They can feel guilty being away from the person in need.  Studies even show that serving as a caregiver often takes a toll on the caregiver’s health.

Your health and well-being are important too, and you can’t be a good caregiver to your loved one if you aren’t healthy. Prioritize your own health, physical and mental—it’s vital for both you and your loved one.

Have a Lot of Patience. This is important because it’s helpful to be patient with yourself. You’ll make mistakes, but remember that you’re trying your best, and no one’s perfect. You should also be aware that communication can sometimes be difficult when you’re caregiving. Your loved one might say or do something that hurts your feelings. This is often due to the underlying illness which may affect your loved one’s personality.  However, do your best to be patient and empathetic. Don’t take it personally. Try to look at the situation with understanding and acceptance to battle discouragement.  This article provides guidance on the topic as well.  https://galligan-law.com/caring-for-an-elderly-parent-without-ruining-your-relationship/

Create Boundaries. When spending so much time with one person, and sharing their most intimate moments, it’s still important to have some boundaries. These can include you knowing your own limitations and what you’re comfortable doing for that person. Boundaries also apply to the person receiving the care and things, such as the way in which that want to be cared for and their likes and dislikes. Boundaries allow both people to be happier.

Remind Yourself of Your Mission. Sometimes, you can become a caregiver out of necessity or a sudden crisis. Nonetheless, at the center of the situation is love and empathy. Caregivers love and want the best for the person they’re helping. You should try to harness that compassion to keep you motivated through hard times.

Get Help.  With so many people serving as caregivers across the country, there are a wealth of resources to support caregivers and their loved ones.  Organizations like the Alzheimer’s Association, Dementia Society and others have information, support groups and other resources to help you in your mission.

Remember that a good caregiver is one who cares. You’re not expected to be perfect, so make certain that you give yourself just as much love and patience as you offer your patient.

Reference: CaringBridge (Feb. 13, 2020) “5 Tips to Be a Good Caregiver”

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Helping Your Elderly Parents during the Pandemic

Our elderly parents are especially vulnerable during the coronavirus, but there are ways to safely help them right now.

Considerable’s recent article entitled “4 things you can do for your aging parents during the coronavirus pandemic” reports that 8 out of 10 deaths reported in the U.S. related to COVID-19 have been in adults 65 years old and older, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Helping our elderly parents during the pandemic has become a major concerns for many people.  If your parents are in one of the vulnerable categories, here are four things you can do right now to help them.

  1. Shop or help them place orders online. With many cities experiencing a shopping frenzy in response to the coronavirus, personal care and household items have quickly disappeared from stores. You can help your parents by allowing them to stay home and going to the store for them and dropping off groceries on their door. You can also place online orders that can be delivered to their home.  Some stores have also set aside times for elder customers to shop to avoid them coming at peak times.
  2. Contact them regularly. The CDC says the coronavirus is believed to spread primarily from person-to-person contact, particularly between people who are closer than six feet from each other. Therefore, you have likely already been separating yourself from your family members outside of your home, including your parents. To avoid possibly exposing your parents, use Skype, FaceTime, or call them on the phone. Stay in close communication to keep their spirits up and check on how they’re feeling. This can help you to verify their mental and physical health, as the days of social distancing add up. You can set up a schedule with specific times you’ll call, so they have something to look forward to throughout the day.
  3. Watch for scams. We’re already hearing about the con artists coming out of the woodwork to prey on the elderly—and all of us in this medical and financial crisis.  See here for a fuller discussion.  https://galligan-law.com/coronavirus-scams-are-surfacing/  Speak to your parents about these scams, so they can protect themselves. The Federal Trade Commission has issued guidelines for avoiding scams, including the following:
  • Hang up on robocalls and don’t press any numbers.
  • Verify your sellers because many online sellers may say they have in-demand products in stock, when they actually don’t.
  • Don’t click on links from sources you don’t know.
  • Research before making donations, and if asked for donations by cash, gift card, or wiring money, pass!
  1. Keep ‘em busy. Seniors have unique challenges when they stay at home. The inactivity that can be linked to being confined in the home can cause declines in physical health and in physical abilities. The elderly are also at greater risk of developing depression in social isolation, and their elevated risk for bad outcomes from this virus can cause higher levels of anxiety and lead to sleep difficulties and other health issues. Encourage your parents to read, play a board game, do a puzzle, or take a walk, provided that they’re keeping distance from others. Many religious groups have also transitioned their services online, and there are plenty of movies and TV shows on-demand for home viewing.

Most significantly, make certain that your parents are taking the pandemic seriously and emphasize the importance of social distancing.  The coronavirus has been hard on everyone, but following these suggestions can help your elderly parents during the pandemic.

Reference:  Considerable (April 8, 2020) “4 things you can do for your aging parents during the coronavirus pandemic”

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Massive Changes to RMDs from Stimulus Package

The coronavirus stimulus package extended IRA contribution deadlines and waived 2020 RMDs.

Several of the provisions that were signed into law in the stimulus package relief bill can taken advantage of immediately, reports Financial Planning in the article “Major changes in RMDs and retirement contributions in $2T stimulus plan.” Here are some highlights.

Extended deadline for 2019 IRA contributions. With the tax return filing date extended to July 15, 2020 from April 16, the date for making 2019 contributions to IRA and Roth IRA contributions has also been extended to the same date. Those contributions normally must be made by April 15 of the following year, but this is no normal year. There have never been extensions to the April 15 deadline, even when taxpayers filed for extensions.

When this tax return deadline was extended, most financial professionals doubted the extension would only apply to IRA contributions, but the IRS responded in a timely manner, issuing guidance titled “Filing and Payment Deadlines Questions and Answers.” These changes give taxpayers more time to decide if they still want to contribute, and how much. Job losses and market downturns that accompanied the COVID-19 outbreak have changed the retirement savings priorities for many Americans. Just be sure when you do make a contribution to your account, note that it is for 2019 because financial custodians may just automatically consider it for 2020. A phone call to confirm will likely be in order.

RMDs are waived for 2020. As a result stimulus package, the Coronavirus Aid, Relief and Economic Security Act (CARE Act), Required Minimum Distributions from IRAs are waived. Prior to the stimulus package’s enactment, 2020 RMDs would be very high as they would be based on the substantially higher account values of December 31, 2019 instead of the current lower values due to the drop in the market. If not for this relief, IRA owners would have to withdraw and pay tax on a much larger percentage of their IRA balances. By eliminating the RMD for 2020, tax bills will be lower for those who don’t need to take the money from their accounts. For 2019 RMDs not yet taken, the waiver still applies. It also applies to IRA owners who turned 70 ½ in 2019. This was a surprise, as the SECURE Act just increased the RMD age to 72 for those who turn 70 ½ in 2020 or later.  See here for a much fuller description of how the SECURE Act changed retirement planning.  https://galligan-law.com/the-secure-act/

IRA beneficiaries subject to the five- year rule. Another group benefiting from these new rules are beneficiaries who inherited in 2015 or later and are subject to the 5-year payout rule. Those beneficiaries may have inherited through a will or were beneficiaries of a trust that didn’t qualify as a designated beneficiary. They now have one more year—until December 31, 2021—to withdraw the entire amount in the account. Beneficiaries who inherited from 2015-2020 now have six years, instead of five.

Additional relief for retirement accounts. The new act also waives the early 10% early distribution penalty on up to $100,000 of 2020 distributions from IRAs and company plans for ‘affected individuals.’ The tax will still be due, but it can be spread over three years and the funds may be repaid over the three-year period.

Many changes have been implemented from the stimulus package. Speak with your estate planning attorney to be sure that you are taking full advantage of the changes and not running afoul of any new or old laws regarding retirement accounts.

Reference: Financial Planning (March 27, 2020) “Major changes in RMDs and retirement contributions in $2T stimulus plan”

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